- remember this is a focused weapons brief - not a game pitch - you can/should describe the world this inhabits but keep it brief and to the point - less backstory that involves the intrigue of the world but more how your creation directly relates to it. Think elevator pitch for this: direct and with fluff removed. - 'what its not' section: be less wishy washy and more direct - identify what HZD did with its weapons and have that be something you designate that you'll avoid - in follow up slides you can further clarify how you will make this its own thing. - materials section is mixing in aesthetics/surface treatment with material - think of this area as each of these being represented by a material ball - you wouldn't have 'reliefs' or 'pressed patterns' on your leather or metal - describe more the wear/tear of these materials rather than how their surfaces are treated - that's another section. - vfx section seems cool - other possible reference could be the vapor trails of ships from a game like homeworld. - schedule looks good! Carry on!
Hi Jessie,
ReplyDeleteHere's my initial feedback for the pitch:
- remember this is a focused weapons brief - not a game pitch - you can/should describe the world this inhabits but keep it brief and to the point - less backstory that involves the intrigue of the world but more how your creation directly relates to it. Think elevator pitch for this: direct and with fluff removed.
- 'what its not' section: be less wishy washy and more direct - identify what HZD did with its weapons and have that be something you designate that you'll avoid - in follow up slides you can further clarify how you will make this its own thing.
- materials section is mixing in aesthetics/surface treatment with material - think of this area as each of these being represented by a material ball - you wouldn't have 'reliefs' or 'pressed patterns' on your leather or metal - describe more the wear/tear of these materials rather than how their surfaces are treated - that's another section.
- vfx section seems cool - other possible reference could be the vapor trails of ships from a game like homeworld.
- schedule looks good! Carry on!